1. Sprinkle in Some Excitement Before it Starts- This bonding vacation should most definitely be at a place where neither of you have ever been before. Looking for a tropical atmosphere? Why not travel the extra mile to the islands of Kauai or Maui? Or perhaps you have been secretly dying to visit the historical city of Athens? Going to a new, unexplored place will open the doors for more excitement and bonding.

2. Shake Vigorously With Sex- Go on vacation with the mindset that you will definitely be having sex every night (at least). If you make it a point to spend some quality time between the sheets, it might become more of a necessity for the two of you than a chore. If you are entirely too tired (both of you), take turns with giving each other full body massages. You don’t need to be an expert masseuse to know how to rub each other the right away. Listen to how your mate responds to different touch and pressure, and you will both be happy, satisfied, and relaxed.

3. Stir in Some New Adventures- Trying activities that you have never experienced could turn out to be bonding in ways that you would not expect, including:  
-- Scuba Diving
-- Helicopter Tours
-- Fishing
-- Parasailing
-- Rent Jet Skis
-- Rent a boat for the day and take a barefoot cruise
-- Just drive around and explore
-- Shop!
-- Go dancing (even if you can’t dance)

As Sarah Kranitz, a teacher from Los Angeles, explains, an adventure that she was not exactly looking forward to turned in to be one of the greatest bonding memories she shares with her now husband. “When my husband and I weren't married yet, we took an incredible trip to the very romantic island of Kauai, Hawaii. Jason figured it would be fun to have an adventure day, where we would hike through the lush Hawaiian forest, canoe down rivers that carried mythical legends, and finally zip line across a canyon! This last part was unannounced to me until I was actually standing at the jump off pad -- I wondered if my future plans to marry this man were still in the cards. So Jason swung first and of course created a theatrical moment for all the other members in our group to see. After deciding that I had to do this for fear that I'd never hear the end of it, I tightened my harness, cinched my helmet strap, and leapt out screaming while I held my eyes shut. I approached the landing area to find Jason laughing, clapping, and cheering for my bravery. At that very moment I was so incredibly happy that I had accomplished this feat and that he was standing there waiting for me the entire time. Since being together for five years, and now being married for two, we continue to bond by enjoying vacations that have something unusual to offer.”

4. Savor the Quiet Time and Don’t Forget the Spontaneity - Not every moment in your vacation has to be filled with fun, sex, and adventure. Sometimes it’s about the quiet moments that just creep upon you when you are not looking. It’s also important to remain light hearted if things don’t go exactly as planned. You are on vacation – so really, anything goes! Keeping that mindset will help you remember to have fun.

“My husband Joe and I had been married for about 6 months, but together for about three and a half years, when we took our first impromptu mini-vacation,” says Cristina Cipolla, a sales manager in Rochester, NY. “With both of our busy lives and opposite schedules (my husband is a chef) we absolutely needed some time for just the two of us. Since Joe and I both hate flying into JFK, and neither of us wanted to drive, we decided we would take a bus to Manhattan. We were actually forced to spend time together, not worrying about directions or whose turn it was to drive. Instead we just caught up with each other on the little things, laughed at people on the bus, and took a nap on each others’ shoulder. It was truly some wonderful and unexpected bonding time. Since the bus arrived at some ungodly early hour in the city, when we went to check into our hotel, they said it wouldn't be ready for a few hours still. So, we decided to go for a walk throughout Times Square - at four thirty in the morning. It was truly amazing how quiet and peaceful that giant of a city was at such an early hour. So we walked and talked - holding hands - all over Times Square and up and down Broadway. No bustling passer-bys, no one trying to sell us anything, no rush, no noise. Just the two of us, in our favorite place, walking through the city like it was ours, talking about life and love and re-connecting. The rest of the trip was fun and light hearted, but the best part was our walk through Times Square.”

5. Stay Positive and Make the Best of Any Situation- Although the suggested reconnecting vacations are meant for just you and your mate, in certain circumstances the opportunity might arise where you will be in the presence of family or friends. In the situation below, Alexandra Laufer, a speech pathologist in Boston who is currently engaged, not only made the best of her lost luggage, but she turned “meeting the family” into a bonding experience between her and her fiancé.

“I went with my then boyfriend to Hong Kong to meet his extended family for family reunion,” says Laufer. “I had been dating Ross for nine years and had heard all about his huge, international family, but had never met them because of the distance. I wanted to make a good impression and packed my best clothes and jewelry. When we arrived in Hong Kong, everyone’s bags arrived but mine. We had a fancy Dim Sum dinner planned in Central Hong Kong for our first big family get together, and all I had was a dirty, bright blue velour sweat suit that I had flown in. I couldn't imagine meeting Ross's grandparents who had been knighted by Queen Elizabeth with greasy hair and wrinkled, stretched out sweats. When we got to the hotel, the refrigerator was packed with fresh produce and there were welcome notes from the family saying to call as soon as we arrived. Ross called up his aunt to thank her for the stocked hotel room and to let know that we arrived... but my luggage did not. Within ten minutes, two uncles, three aunts and six cousins arrived to take me to the shops in Central Hong Kong before dinner so I would feel better about losing my luggage. In minutes, I had more clothes than I needed for the whole trip. His family made me feel welcomed right away. Seeing part of his heritage and meeting his large, loving family only made me fall deeper in love with Ross. I didn’t get everything that was in that suitcase back, but what I left Hong Kong with was so much better.”

Whether you enjoy quiet times, spontaneous fun, adventure, historical landmarks, or the beach, make sure you ENJOY yourselves and make the best of your time together no matter what activities you and your mate choose to do. If you can realize how important and needed a vacation is for your relationship, you have already completed the first step- and the rest is as easy as lying on a beach!  Stick with the above rules in the  “recipe for bonding” and your friends might be asking to borrow a few ideas.

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